AdTurds Bad Adverts – Badverts

About AdTurds

This blog is written by a man who hates bad adverts. It used to be written by two people who hate bad adverts. If you would like to submit your own review head to this page and leave a comment.

Why AdTurds?

It's a play on Adwords - Google's proprietary online cash hoover.

What's that Janet Street-Porter quote about then?

Janet nicked a choice quote by me to use in her Daily Mail column and attributed it simply to an 'advertiser blogger'.

Contact AdTurds

If you must get in touch with me to offer me money for a paid link, complain about one of my posts or give me a million quid to design your next campaign, fill out the form.

I am wholeheartedly open to bribery, especially from Adidas, Jaguar, Honda, Porsche, Volvo, Original Source, Lucozade, Green & Black's, Sabatier, Sony, Apple, Le Crueset, Yorkshire Tea and any breweries, vineyards and distilleries.

  • Jg

    You should do it on the uro golf club. Hilariously gross.

  • Jg

    You should do it on the uro golf club. Hilariously gross.

  • Lillie Langtry

    If I see one more ad about over 50 life insurance … that offers me a free Parker pen if I don’t kick the bucket, I’ll scream

  • Lillie Langtry

    If I see one more ad about over 50 life insurance … that offers me a free Parker pen if I don’t kick the bucket, I’ll scream

  • SteveO

    Love what you are doing. Hope that the ad “industry” reads this.

  • Are TV channels colluding to send me to the psychiatrist for a lobotomy by synchronising ad breaks? As I grab the control and switch the mind numbing advert forced into my living room to any other channel, I find I’m exposed to bloody adverts there too. I don’t ask much out out of life, but an hour of TV without twenty minutes af adverts I guess IS too much.

  • FGFG

    EVERY FUCKING AD ON YOUTUBE!!!!!!!!

  • Iain Spanner

    Brilliant site. Cannot believe I’ve not discovered it sooner. I’m with Bill Hicks when it comes to adverts. If you are a poor jobbing actor, you do what you have to do. If you are a minted, famous celebrity and you start doing the voiceovers and the rest then your artistic integrity is gone. For example, Stephen Fry trying to sell me f*cking pet insurance with free dog food, Clooney trying to flog me nazi-coffee etc. etc.
    In addition I hate everything that BT have ever done. This latest menage-a-trois seems even more soul-destroying than the previous dead-eyed couple.However the black-belt grand-masters of sh*t advertising, who deliver again and again and again with adverts so gruesomely irritating that you feel like going to your nearest branch with a machete and a Mac-10 has to be the Halifax. The “real” staff singing fills me with pathological hatred but then that was topped for toe-curling wretchedness with the radio-station? Sweet Jesus! Yet I bet an ad company filled with coke-snorting pricks with ponytails somewhere in London were paid millions to curl that campaign out. AAARRGGHH! Thanks for letting me get that off my chest, I feel much better now.

  • Nic D

    Anyone hate the money supermarket adverts? The fat ugly greasy twat who quite frankly makes me want to puke my innards out as he swans around Vegas, I scream go on a diet u ugly irritating cunt .

  • Dfallow

    That new advert with the bloke raping someone. Truly, truly shocking and I genuinely don’t like watching it, which I guess is the point. But seriously, what is the world coming to when we need tv ads reminding us not to rape people? What’s next, tv ads warning us not to go on murderous rampages or start setting off bombs on packed commuter trains? Horrible!

  • Please Please Please Please write another post with the Analytics data – or better still – add me as a viewer so I can enjoy the results on a daily basis 😀

  • Mark Monks

    I thought it was just me who was driven to distraction by ads! Great website. Suggested ad from me is the new npower that goes on about keeping down energy prices and asks you to go to npower.co.ukFIX just to rub it in our faces how fixed the prices are.

  • Lukeaikman

    you two are sad little twats arent you?!

  • Tabasco2152

    Best laugh I have had for ages- please keep it up 🙂

  • Joe

    Literally the best Blog i have read in a long time!

  • Ade

    Was I the only person who hated the CGI’d characters in the Gillete Ads? I like this site – but then is it subliminal advertising by being full of admittedly shit adverts?

  • Kit

    Dagnabbit. I’ve been blogging this crap for the last few months without realising that there was anyone else doing it, and doing a much better job of it too. Oh well. It’s good to get it out of your system anyway.

  • GDJ

    Firstly, very pleased to have found this site.

    Secondly and far more importantly……Can someone please give a kick in the kahunas to who ever devised or was involved in any way at all with the creation of that ear-cancer of a ad ‘we buy any’ …..Its no good I despise it so much I cannot even bring myself to complete the title of it. Lets just say ‘that steaming noxious pile of repugnant festering fecal matter’ that sticks to either side of top gear on Dave and Dave ja vu.

    It may sponsor motoring on Dave but I will never in my entire life EVER consider using such a tacky company due to its intrusion into my personal space. It is such a hatefully vile tune (sorry to insult the word tune), i abhor it so much and its mundane repetitive airing that I no longer watch the channels at all.

    Also a punt in the plumbs to the person/s at Dave who actually allows that Craponica on their channel. Dave could do its image a world of good if it just had some mild degree of pride in the caliber of advertisers that it actually allowed to infest its channel.

    There should be a law against this excrement and its assault on my ears. I miss Top Gear on Dave very much but simply cannot tollerate this ‘S**T’ in my ears any more. WBAC . . . F U.

    Anyway to the creators of this site I wish you and you product ‘Good Luck’, it feels so good having had this rant on a site dedicated to such matters. Kindred spirits in a shallow, superficial world of spin.

  • Zola The Gorgon

    Nice to know I’m not the only one shouting at the TV. Share the rage.

  • ged

    Advertising should be banned. All ads. Everywhere. I cant think of another single use of our legislative body that would have a more beneficial influence on society.

    Your website is quite good though.

  • Switch

    I like it, good stuff!! Roger you’re obviously a cock!!
    I bet you buy your cards from Funky pigeon too!!

    • DownviewBabe

      Or ‘Mooonpig.com’……………..
      Which incidentally is missing from here !

  • Matt

    Keep it up Robin. Very amusing stuff. Few things get me angrier than a crap advert. It’s good to laugh/rage about shit telly.

    Matt

  • Robin Brown

    Ah, Roger, you’re a dick on so many levels I don’t know where to start.

  • Roger Askly

    What a stupid idea for a website!!!
    Things you think about when you make a website… will it make any money?
    Does this make any money?
    NO.
    Seeing you’re so big on ad’s why don’t you get some ads on ure site and start earning something.. then again your web traffic must be very low.

    • DownviewBabe

      Is your name really Barry Scott ? Go on, is it ?

  • Luce

    BTW sincere apologies for my error for using the spellings grey and gray. i am ashamed.

  • Luce

    I know you mentioned the one about ‘Just for Men’ – new ties
    But what about the one that blnds away only some of the gray.
    If you dont know the one i’ll kindly recite it as it is now burned into my memory.

    (man with gray hair) “my gray hair shows I have experience”
    (same man only with obviously dyed hair) “MY hair shows I have energy”

    (cheezy voice-over) ‘now new Just for Men blends only blends away half your grays’

    (man now merged from earlier two) “now I have energy AND experience!!”

    and promptly goes on to get the job, bed the woman, and run the marathon or whatever else ‘just for men’ feel you need both energy & experience to pull off which you wouldnt have been able to do already if you had kept your sad, grey hair you old pathetic greying bastard.

  • richard castro

    nothing on tv turns my otherwise resilient tummy like the BT bullshit that unless im mistaken is meant to endear us to the adverts characters.

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