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14Aug/170

How Amazon Killed LoveFilm In 13 Tweets

I used to use Love Film By Post - it was like going to a video store but easier. You chose what you wanted, they posted it out to you, you watched it then popped it back in the post. It seems kinda absurd now but this seemed cheerfully hi-tech in the early 2000s when such services started springing up. Now it's dead and it seems like another nail in the coffin for physical discs. Have we learned nothing from the resurgence of vinyl and cassette?

Needless to say the company driving a spike through it is Amazon, which seems to be eating up everything on the planet like a gigantic combine harvester. Rather like Yahoo - another behemoth of the internet age, now facing oblivion to the dismay of precisely no-one - Amazon seems apt to buy up companies within its sphere and run them into the ground.

When it acquired LoveFilm in 2011 it was thought to herald a challenge to Netflix. Alas Amazon made a series of strategic bungles and seemed to lose interest, as tweets from customers bear out.

That this is another sign that physical discs are on their way out is small beer in itself - the fact that streaming services offer a paradoxically tiny and depressingly mainstream selection of largely shit films is more proof of the growing homogenisation of a culture where niche interests are deemed economically unviable.

Seriously - see how many films made before 2000 you can find on Netflix; see how many pre-colour movies there are. Frankly, see how many good films there are on these streaming services.

Welcome to a future of Star Wars, Transformers and the guns'n'gangsters redux of Netflix Originals forever.

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23Jul/170

Did Anyone Say Maccy D’s?

did someone say maccy d's?

I hate McDonald's, but you know that already. I hate their abysmal food, destruction of the environment and the way they tried to exploit child bereavement in a recent new low.

I also hate people saying Maccy D's as if it's some sort of fun carnival and they're seven years old and trying to impress someone they fancy by using yoof slang. What's next? Burgy K's? For fuck's sake.

Chances are, I suspect, if you ever used the phrase Maccy D's in all seriousness you're a gibbering simpleton with a higher-than-average chance of developing Type II Diabetes. And if you prefaced it with 'cheeky' you're a total moron. Sorry about that.

Depressingly, McDonald's trademarked the slang brand Maccy D's, thereby turning the words of dribbling imbeciles into a sickly corporate landgrab: A kind of mirroring of slack-jawed fecklessness and crass corporate cunning.

This latest McDonald's advert fixates on this idea of people being excited because someone 'mentioned Maccy D's'. Needless to say everyone featured in the advert is a toddler - making a nonsense of McDonald's protestations that it doesn't target children in its advertising.

'Maccy D's' is yet another route to market to children (or people who share their mental ages) by appearing non-threatening, cool and exciting. By positioning McDonalds - who continue to sell something called a 'happy meal' for fuck's sake - as a treat that children might associate with holidays, birthdays and good behaviour it's clearly targeting the pester power dynamic that drives adults to feed their kids stuff they know is bad for them.

And if you're on of those parents why not get your kids hooked on cigarettes and hard liquor too? That way you can bribe them much more easily when they're being little ****s.

Theres something else I find obnoxious here - the implication that playing, going to a gallery or a day out is somehow to be endured only because there's a spinal column in a bap wrapped in sugary bread at the end of it.

No, you didn't hear someone say Maccy D's McDonald's EveryDave, you heard a chorus throughout the country of 'fuck right off Maccy D's'.

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