AdTurds Bad Averts – Badverts –

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Tell me about the worst advert currently on television - the one that really grinds your gears, the one that makes you switch off, hurl obscenities at the television or simply throw yourself out of the window.

The Admiral advert, Tesco advert or Just Eat advert? Or long-running series from the likes of Money Supermarket, or Go Compare? Or simply the newest thing that had you gouging your face in annoyance.

I'll try to track down the worst offenders and give them the AdTurds treatment. It won't change anything - but it might make you feel very slightly better about the world.

Browse the old comment section - with over 1100 comments complaining about adverts - for more misnathropy.

Do your worst - but keep it civil. No personal abuse - and anything that smacks of bigotry in any way will be deleted and the user banned. That means:

    No racism.
    No sexism.
    No homophobia.

  • Jon Harris

    That Admiral Ad…those characters .remind me of a job I had to endure.When your ‘colleagues’ pretend to be interested in the business and job culture ..while on bird seed wages..

  • Jon Harris

    My gripe on ads….that fucking annoying ukulele music esp on Ben and Jerry’s…ice cream..
    and most other products…bad combo ukulele and that annoying light glockenspiel bolloks

  • Jon Harris

    Jeremy a poor substitute for machismo…He reminds me of those 6th form lower middle class tossers..Is he the option against the crypto metrosexual mincing, and lame trendy wendys of modern culture?….think not

  • Sharon Presland

    Not directed to one particular advet but rather to most adverts for baby stuff. Do not speak to us new mums like WE have suddenly turned one year old. We are grown ups. Our brain went nowhere. Stop saying the word “baby” to us in that condescending, naff and “cute” tone to us. We do not like.

  • Sharon Presland

    That cat that says Puuuurfect this and that whilst sitting on a tumble dryer or something. Gaaah!!! Enough!!!!!

  • Sharon Presland

    Oh no- it’s back! TheThis Girl Can campaign. It is not just annoying, long or pointless ( are you seriously giving me permission to do sports, in 2017???? ) it actually makes me feel nauseous. All that sweaty flesh jiggling about and on and on it goes. Why just WHY? I get the message it is trying to send out but frankly it puts me off sports-and my dinner too.

    • Paul LJ Catlow

      There’s a similar advert going on with a similar sort of name which is all about female emancipation and “changing the script”. All very worthy. But I can’t help noticing how often both these adverts segue into an immediately following one which is for cosmetics, expensive shampoo, clothes companies, et c which could be described as “right, we’ve done the politically correct one to show we care. Now this is how you women are SUPPOSED to think and act. Get with the REAL programme!” et c.

  • Both of them. I feel sorry for the animals in those adverts, they deserve better.

  • Andy B

    The new Safestyle window ads,proud to be uk no1.The lady answering the door far too friendly to the window fitter and then almost seen cuddling into him as she views the latest designs on his laptop,is she not happy enough that her husband is treating her to new windows rather than flirting with the fitter?

    • Pad

      Yeah shit upvc windows ,product of the petrochemical industry just what we need to save the planet

  • leeleem77

    Currently I am hating the Clucking Woman at the beginning and the “NO WAAAAY!” Squealing Woman on the Head and Shoulders advert.

  • Andy B

    Compere the market Meerkat ads are another becoming quite tiresome.Their accents which i suppose are meant to be Polish must be getting quite boring for our foreign visitors,let alone that to have these cuddly characters is supposed to make it all ok for car insurance companys to charge us a fortune for their services.Perhaps having the Meerkats around makes everything ok.

    • Pad

      Yes I have an attic full of the little shits, (the stuffed toys !) advert gone on too long now,stop the adverts then in twenty years they might be worth something’s on eBay,

  • Andy B

    The Gerald Lukehurst furniture store ads,every reason why you should never attempt to save a few quid and present the ad yourself.For gods sake get a proper actor in next time Gerald.These ads will be familiar if you live in the south east region.

  • James Hobbs

    The Argos ‘whoa a whoa whoa whoa’ advert.

    The advert itself is incidental and changes with whatever products are on sale. The thing that hasn’t changed in about three years is the music. God knows how many times I’ve had to mute the TV whenever it’s come on. I bet the band who performed it have disowned the song now too.

    Here’s to another decade of the same music in Argos’s cheap and not cheerful adverts …

  • Sharon Presland

    I started hating the woman in the Trivago ads. Something about the robotic, over-posed way she moved her arms when always saying the same boooring lines. “For the best price”. Then I started feeling somewhat sorry for her as it became apparent her stylist hates her and has made it her mission in life to dress her in ever more horrible outfits each time. And now… sinking to a new low… tap dancing in this bizarre skirt??? Wtf!!! Yep her bosses HATE her and clearly get off on humiliating her further with each new instalment of this ghastly adturd. Stop it already, poor girl!

  • Steph

    That woman who looks completely unhinged whilst laugh-exclaiming ‘I didn’t know Oral B made a toothpaste!’

    What the fuck did you think they made, dishwashers?

  • Victor Ferreiro

    Have you seen that strange adturd for a VIPoo spray which masks the smell of turds? I thought it was a spoof – What a stinker!

  • Daveydave7

    Nationwide poetry adverts

  • Sharon Presland

    This new Sainsbury’s ad with the people dancing in their kitchen whilst they cook. No words for just how utterly cr*p it is.
    The muller light ones where some girl eats yogurt whilst perving at some beefcake that always has a mishap when she suddenly screeches_ 99 calories????!!! Just put the teeth away!!! For goodness sake!!!

  • Leigh

    I’m not even sure what this travesty is advertising? Some kind of groupon thing..?

  • Steph

    Bensons for Beds. Specifically the bit at the end where that infinitely smug bint sings ‘lucky, lucky me’. It inspires a homicidal rage in me more suitable for a japanese teeneager avenging the death of her murdered father…

  • leeleem77

    Cadburys, dragging out that shit, irritating 70s disco song and the creepy looking man in the purple tank top. please make it stop!

    • Sharon Presland

      Agree its a dumb shit advert buy I find the guy kind of cute ha ha

  • Paul LJ Catlow

    Fry-light. The nodding. The bloody nodding. And worst, two ad agencies (presumably) can’t talk to each other, or else whoever had rights to the music saw an opportunity and licenced it to two adverts simulateneousy (double the royalties?). so that head-nodding music is also being used, at exactly the same time, for two wholly unrelated products.

    It’s also there in the Virgin Rail advert where bloke travels to meet GF’s family for the first time. Exactly. The Same. Music. So you watch an advert for trains and think “overpriced spray oil which is 80% water”. then you watch the FryLight advert and think of foul, inedible, vastly overpriced food sold at railway stations or on trains.

    Wonder if the two ad agencies involved have realised yet? Or if, at some sort of level, they’re testing out some devious strategy for advertising two products simultaneously – tying together synthetic chemical spray-oil and train travel in Virgin cattle-wagons, in the minds of the viewer, two for the price of one….

  • Sharon Presland

    Oh and Park Savings. Thanks for ruining the Santa thing for my children with your cutesy oooopsy wooopsy display of festive incompetence. I called them out over it on their FB page… No reply.

  • Sharon Presland

    A new irritation from Beagle Street. The couple moving house. The voice of the girl when she nags him over protecting their mortgage. The way she talks!!!! Ending every sentence like a question. Aagh!!! Just SHUT UP!!!!!! The poor dude waking up to that voice for the rest of his pitiful life.

  • Derek

    I have to leave the room when that lloyds bank advert with that stupid honking music starts up.

  • Julian

    I might be wrong, but did Chris Evans use his child to do the advert for 500 words on the radio 2 trailer? It was excruciatingly irritating for the last 2 years. I bless my lucky stars that this year it is a whisper instead, but I swear it’s still his kid which reminds me of the last annoying advert. I might be wrong though, as I said already. But repetition sells doesn’t it? Doesn’t it?

  • Dave Quinn
    • hardjackson

      Interestingly all the articles relating to it have been take down.

  • Amon Khaiba

    The advert for gold coins where the irritating yank says “you brits” more times than necessary, presumably in attempt at endearment.

    The gist of the advert is that “you brits” are shit at everything but…. your gold coins aren’t entirely shit. Well thanks alot you smug yankee fuck.. how is this “advert” supposed to make people want to do anything other than hate americans.

    Fuck him and fuck gold coins.

  • James Hobbs

    Knowing Adturds’ attitude to crimes against music, can I make a bid for Fiber (sp) One’s ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ advert to be rightfully slimed on this website?

    A web search tells me that the ad was made in 2013 from the Saatchi & Saatchi stable, but has only just entered my consciousness. With
    adapted lyrics as bad as the Flash dog advert, it’s truly horrendous. ‘Forever I’ve been praying for a snack in my life, and now I have a brownie ending all of my strife’. Struggling for a rhyme for ‘life’, were we? ‘I finally found the right snack’ brings the event to an oddly abrupt end, choosing to ignore the lines that made Bonnie Tyler’s song so famous. It feels like something that the contestants on The Apprentice would make or some Media Studies A-Level students who started with promise and then lazily hacked together the last few parts to scrape by with a C.

    The product it’s advertising that I assume is designed to allow for easier bowel movements already looks like a dried up poo already too.

  • Sharon Presland This girl dancing around with all the boxes. Gaaaaah! when ad makers don’t have a CLUE what to do, they just get someone to dance. And they get PAID for all that thinking.

  • A Guest

    Worst ad TURD is the Jeremy Clarkson Amazon Fire Stick ad TURD.
    1. I have literally no clue what the fuck it is. Even after going Amazon’s website and reading about it, it was just all techno goobledygook.

    2. Clarkson’s absurd, irritating over the top accent pisses me off.

    3. WHY does him sending some over to France and Germany by drone constitute something funny? At the end he smirks like a naughty schoolboy. Meanwhile, I have NO FUCKING CLUE why he thinks this is funny.

    So well done Amazon, you failed to convey what a product is, does or is for, plus you handed over a shit-ton of money to a presenter who just pisses off the audience (plus fails to convey ANY information whatsoever). Fuck off Amazon.

    • Jon Harris

      Brilliantly put..A Guest….JC is an annoying twat..

  • Lorem Ipsum Dolor

    Cravendale’s “Behold The Milk Drinker”
    He’s alone at night in a stationary car because:
    a.He’s homeless
    b. He’s stalking someone
    He’s dancing with a glass of milk because
    a. He doesn’t have anyone to dance with
    b. He’s having some kind of breakdown
    He’s in a laundrette because:
    a. He lives in a rented flat without a washing machine
    b. He’s homeless and just goes in to get warm
    He’s tying a shoelace with one hand because
    a. He’s got nowhere better to get to any time soon
    b. It’s a good hobby for someone with no disposable income
    So What was the benefit of being a milk drinker again?

    • ThatBoyNeedsTherapy

      I actually liked the weird, Tim Burton esque Cravendale ads from a few years back, the one with the biscuit boy and the creepy accompanying song. Reminded me a tad of the epochal ‘Judderman’ Metz ads from the 90s…

      Agree though, the current one is shite and on my list of immediate mute button hits.

      • Paul LJ Catlow

        Fridge logic dictates. If biscuit disintegrates when dunked in liquid for too long. how did Mr and Mrs Biscuit get it together to conceive Baby Biscuit? Or was it a case of “we can only do this once, so let’s make it a good one”. Or did Mummy bake Daddy a new one…. the mind boggles.

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