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1Jan/167

Just Eat Adverts – Crimes Against Music

Just Eat adverts

The new series of Just Eat adverts seem to signalling a new front in the ongoing war against humanity that advertising so often represents. In the I Need A Balti and Chicken Madras ads we have a notification of intent; a warning shot over the bows.

Because the fact that these two ads have come out in quick succession suggests there's a whole new array of mind-melting adverts for the internet takeaway service. Korma Chameleon? Tikka To Ride? Vindaloo Killed The Radio Star? Don't bet against it.

Most companies - especially internet-based companies - new to television advertising are out to make an impact. And when these companies offer a service, rather than a product, there's very little point in shelling out the millions of quids required to make and promote your brand if you don't. So Just Eat and rival Hungry House look likely to join the ranks of price-comparison sites, betting companies and banks in giving you a metaphorical ear-flick several times a day.

And while the Just Eat Adverts aren't that egregious in the first place - the I Need A Balti ad even spoofs itself, pleasingly - anything that arrives uninvited in your home several times a day is going to get tired extremely quickly. Imagine someone making a mildly amusing pun. Now imagine them repeating it about 200 times. That's what we've got to look forward to here.

As a result I have to file both of the Just Eat adverts thus far - and the thousands to come - under Crimes Against Music. And though I don't have a lot of time for Groove Armada's I See You, I don't know what Bonnie Tyler has done to deserve I Need A Hero being so roughly taken up the bum.

My prediction: Wake Up, Little Sushi beaming out of your telly throughout 2016.

NB. Is it just me or in this Chicken Madras advert has the girl in it just been shagged by the backing dancer? No wonder she's got an appetite.

NB2. Warming to their theme, there's also a Christmas Just Eat advert riffing on The 12 Days Of Christmas, coming in at a staggering two-and-a-half minutes. I think that's testing the patience of even the LOL generation. The highest-rated comment on Youtube as I write?

'Twats'.

Which is your most-hated of the Just Eat adverts?

'just eat advert actor'

Always harsh to single out the actors but these tweets caught my eye on Twitter.

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