Kwik Fit hypnotist is clearly a child abuser

Imagine going to take your car to be repaired and before fixing the problem the bloke at the garage puts your kid to sleep with a click of his fingers. Personally, I’d be quite disturbed by that but apparently it’s all part of the service if you go to Kwik Fit.

The advert where the annoying little kid gets put to sleep by the Kwik Fit repair man is truly very weird. I like to imagine an alternative version, perhaps ruled out during pre-production, where the garage bloke punches the child in the face. It would work just as well (edgy!) but would of course be considered an unacceptable depiction of violent child abuse against a vulnerable young person suffering from attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.

The hypnotist angle provides a neat solution, in that the child is still “knocked out” – and thus shuts the fuck up like we all wish he would – without any of the nasty NSPCC connotations.

What’s really bizarre about the ad is the woman’s reaction. Instead of screaming “What have you done to my boy!?” or even “Help!” she accepts her son’s fate with the incongruous words:

Brilliant, thanks, that’s great.

Perhaps the Kwik Fit guy has already spiked her drink with valium. One can only imagine what happens once it kicks in proper.

There’s no resolution either. The kid could still be asleep for all we know. It’s bleak.