Not a list I’ve compiled, this is something Campaign has done – so don’t shoot the messenger and all that.
I’ve reproduced them below as they bear some analysis. None of the worst Xmas adverts of 2011, many of which feature celebs, made it but there’s some degree of crossover with my worst ads of the year list.
1. Head & Shoulders, Jenson Button
Campaign says: “Cheesy monstrosity”
AdTurds says: Don’t blame Button; blame the freeform poetry about Dandruff shampoo written by a non-English speaker.
2. BritBingo, Gavin Henson
Campaign says: “…the only way Henson could demean himself even further is if he starred in a dodgy Channel 5 reality show in which he embarked on an embarrassing search for a new girlfriend.”
AdTurds says: He’s the next Matt Dawson
3. Eurostar, Jarvis Cocker
Campaign says: “…a mess… random.”
AdTurds says: Utter Euroballs
4. Just for Men, Luis Figo
Campaign says: “new low… cheesy spot”
AdTurds says: Love a Figo role
5. Bernard Matthews, Marco Pierre White
Campaign says: “centred on turkey”
AdTurds says: If MPW can do this for cash, he’ll bum a turkey for cash
6. Flora, Vernon Kay
Campaign says: “awful”
AdTurds says: Invites the reading that Kay is now living with his mum after Tess kicked him out over TextGate. Ad should have ended with him rubbing one out to a woman’s bra on his mobile.
7. Venky’s, Blackburn Rovers
Campaign says:bad performances this year, but this one was the worst of the lot.
AdTurds says: Think Blackburn Rovers: Think machine-recovered chicken bits
8. Schweppes, Uma Thurman
Campaign says: “uncomfortable”
AdTurds says: Hard to believe that bending over, spreading her buttocks and saying “I love Schweppes… in al the wrong places!” would have been much more embarrassing for Thurman.
9. Very.co.uk, Diana Vickers
Campaign says: “cringe… patronising… very long time.”
AdTurds says: Who?
10. Isme, Lynda Bellingham
Campaign says: “Could Bellingham stoop any lower?”
AdTurds says: Could stoop any lower? If Campaign means ‘could she stoop any lower than making an inoffensive advert?’ I’d say the answer is yes.