Warburtons stalks Japanese businessman

Call me old-fashioned, but if bread started stalking me I’d be frightened, confused and angry. I’d be wondering why Warburtons, Allisons, Hovis, Mighty White or Kingsmill was trying to get me. If there was one thing likely to put me off eating bread it would be veiled threats from bread-makers.

That’s exactly what appears to be happening in this vaguely Kafka-esque for advert for Warburtons, which apparently is now the nation’s favourite.

It’s all a bit like one of those reveals that Derren Brown does, where he shows people exactly how he’s manipulated an ad executive in doing exactly what he wanted him to do.

Either that or it’s like a British version of David Fincher’s seminal paranoiac thriller The Game. With bread.

And why a Japanese businessman? What does bread have against Japan? He looks rightly terrified. I half expected a threatening note telling the guy in the advert to go back from whence he came under the dish at the end.

So, to sum up, bread. Once a tasty reassuring treat. Now the snack equivalent of Glenn Close. God help us.